When you get to a certain point, you have the opportunity to review your life and your beliefs. My life has had more twists and turns than the average mystery novel and on the whole, I can’t say I have always been happy with every outcome. Dreams come and go and living a dream is not always what Hollywood and the mainstream make them out to be. Nothing is perfect and no one that draws breath is either.
In my teenage years, I found myself at a point of decision when it comes to my life. I needed to realize that life is not the accumulation of money, things or friends that you can exploit. Religion, specifically Christianity, took a main role in my years since then and I’d love to say that it made things smooth and easy. It didn’t. Part of that was the imperfect world that we live in and part of it was the imperfect person that I am. Decisions that I made have led to something that I said I didn’t want to experience, regret. Chances are we can all say that with some agreement. We are not a perfect people.
This is not to say that I haven’t had some great things happen and I will admit that there are several that I look on with a true sense of humble thanks. Family and friends have been there when many things have turned on me. When I have struggled with the pain brought on by job loss, the loss of loved ones, betrayal by friends or anything else that has come my way, I have been refocused on my center by those that are in my inner circle. Through all of the pain, grief, heartache, tears and more, I find myself saying the lyrics to a song I listened to in the 80’s that has taken on new meaning in the years since that time, I Still Believe.
Belief in your world, your God and your inner circle is hard when things have taken a turn, but knowing that there is more than just the struggles I see is a comfort. Knowing that there is someone that guides my steps in those times has been a true life saving experience.
Yes, I have lived a life of interest and fun. I’ve also lived a life of struggle and hardship. In the end, I still believe because I have seen too much not to. I’ve lost count of the many times that I have been saved from something horrible to think that all of it is random. Knowing that things work out for good, sometimes at the very last second and in the most inconceivable way shows me that God is watching. I invite you to explore what I have and see if you come to the same conclusion.